Overnight Dates and DRAMA!

“It’s part one of the shocking conclusion of the Bachelorette” – from Chris Harrison himself (sounds kind of familiar…).  Unfortunately, some jerkface put the ending via Reality Steve on Facebook.  On FACEBOOK!  A whole two weeks before the end!  So I believe I know what happens and what Des is up to now (I’ll put this spoiler at the bottom, after a lot of spaces, if you want to know).  Ooh, “The television event of the summer starts right now.” Chris has gotten some new material.

Fairy tale!  Drink!  Des is standing on a sailboat looking longingly into her future, I’m sure.  Since Zak is gone, I guessing we can get through this episode without anyone singing – although Chris is still around, so there will probably still be some poetry.  I guess I’m not a romantic.  Flashbacks from the season – they’re showing Brian (right?) the guy whose girlfriend showed up.  I read that they are back together – come on girl, have some self respect.

First date is Drew – lots of “wow this place is amazing” – I feel like these two are still a little awkward together for how far along in this journey we are – he might be going home next.  Des is going on about how good looking Drew is – abs, eyes, face – Amen sister.

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“You’re sincere, you’re honest, blah blah blah” – seems forced to me.  Now it’s gotten dark, and they are kissing beneath an umbrella in the rain – why do I like this show?  Des declares you can feel the love from Drew’s lips.  Hmmmm.  Now they’re talking about how the rain won’t ruin their evening oh my GOODNESS this is a snooze.  Fantasy suite card comes out and bow-chicka-wow-wowwwwww.  Drew is enthusiastically in.  They’re so boring, I’m not even going to write about what they’re saying.  Amazing, princess, you get the idea.  They both know Drew is ready to propose, and he kicks the camera guys out (“Okay guys, time to leave”) – that was a little bit funny.

And suddenly we’re back in Idaho, where Brooks is strolling through the park looking forlorn, because he isn’t ready to tell Desiree that he loves her.  You know, everyone does the stressed-out-stroll on this show.  No one ever just has a cigarette.

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Brooks isn’t comfortable with proposing at the end of this, and doesn’t want to answer the question “Do you love Desiree.”  Definitely a problem.  Sis tells him he knows the answer.  Sis is smart.  More or less, it sounds like if this was a regular relationship, Brooks would be fine – things are happening, but not fast enough for the Bachelorette (“Hello” to “Will you marry me?” in six weeks!).  Mom and sis encourage him to have that tough conversation and tell Des the truth.

Hey this is how my dog is sitting to watch with me – he’s pretty funny, huh?

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Chris’ date – I hope they aren’t as boring as Drew’s date, they’ve been less than thrilling in the past…although I did find it endearing with the two of them for some reason.  They’re off to explore Antigua (which apparently is pronounced without the “u”?) in a helicopter to Barbuda for a picnic on the beach – I kind of miss Sean and his zany dates.  They’re laying in the sand making out – that cannot be comfortable, and Des is going to need a real thorough shower before the fantasy suite knowwhatImean?  I do like them together.  Listening to Chris talk about how much he loves her tugs at my heartstrings a bit, much more so than with Drew.

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They’re at dinner, and Chris just asked Des how she feels about moving to Seattle.  This might be a deal-breaker for Des, she really likes CA – but now she says she can do what she wants anywhere, and is definitely open to it.  Des says there is an easiness with her and Chris – I knew it.  Their fantasy suite is pretty kickass and ON NO IT’S ANOTHER POEM!  It was more of a letter, so not too bad.  Lots of pool kissing.

Dun dun dunnnnnnn…Brooks is here, and is talking with Chris.  I wonder who Chris thinks is the biggest tool he’s met on the show, it’s been a lot of seasons!  Chris straight up asks “Are you not in love with this girl?” and Brooks can’t answer…Chris says he’s hearing that Des is not the girl for Brooks.  It’s taking him a while to admit it, but he finally says he doesn’t think Des is the love of his life.  He admits he’s been ready to get married before and it didn’t work out, so obviously he’s felt stronger for another woman in the past than he is feeling for Des.  He’s feeling the guilt and getting teary.  They’re dragging this out a little loooooong.  Chris tells him to man up and have the conversation with Des, and Brooks agrees, as soon as he can.  Despite his best efforts, he can’t force love.

Oh ABC, you are so cruel, letting Des go on and on about how crazy she is about Brooks.  She definitely saved the hot outfit for Brooks – so jealous of her stomach!

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She is so excited to see him, and he’s upset right off the bat – at least he didn’t waste any time letting her know something was wrong, and there weren’t a bunch of awkward “How are you?”s like when Emily gave Arie the fantasy date boot.  He’s telling her all the shit people say to people when they’re sorry to be hurting them, the stuff that makes the dumpee say “Well then why don’t you want me?”  Poor Des.  I think she wants him to get to the point, as she asks how he really feels.  I think she really is sad, but I also wonder if part of her is thinking about how she’ll be the first bachelor/bachelorette to go home empty-handed, since she’s straight up said he is the frontrunner.  OOOHHhhh, why now – she’s getting pissed!  Des has her knees up on the bench in front of her and her head in her knees – this is really very sad.  She just whispered “I don’t know what to say.  I love you.” and he asks why she didn’t say it earlier – WTF would that have mattered?!  If that would have made a difference, it makes me think that Brooks was just a big chicken, afraid to say it first if it might not have been said back.  Des says she’s never felt completely loved by anyone.  So much sadness.

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If she wanted to feel completely loved, maybe she should have kept Brandon around – HEY-O!

“I don’t care that you just broke my heart – I love you.”  Ouch.  And more crying, even by Brooks by himself.  Now they’re walking, and Des says the only reason for her being conflicted throughout this process is because she didn’t want to share her heart, she wanted to give it to him.  Brooks says he’ll shut up b/c he’s not helping, and Des agrees.  Ah, angry Des.  And one last, long hug goodbye.  Oh wait there is another one.  Des speed-walks out to the pier, and gets a moment’s privacy (likely only because there are no camera men in the water) while we watch Brooks cry and swear.

Des ends the show saying it breaks her heart knowing she has two dudes who do love her, but she can’t love them the way she loved Brooks – for her, it’s over.

So – according to the previously mentioned jerk on fb who posted Reality Steve’s spoiler (don’t read any further if you don’t want to know)…

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Brooks and Des are together and engaged.  My guess is she gives the other two dudes the boot and Brooks comes back ever-so regretful of his decision.  Till next week!

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Bacon Broccoli Berry Salad

This is a recipe developed by my mama.  Perfect for summer dinner on the deck – and so easy!

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8 slices of crisp cooked bacon, crumbled
1 bunch broccoli, cut up
1/2 cup dried cranberries
3/4 cup Light Miracle Whip
1/3 cup sugar  (1/4 if you want to tone down the sweetness)
3 tablespoons raspberry or cider vinegar
1/2 cup finely chopped red onion

1. In a very large bowl stir together Miracle Whip, sugar, and vinegar.

2. Place red onion and cranberries in a colander; pour boiling water over. Drain well.

3. Combine dressing mixture, onion and cranberry mixture, and broccoli and bacon. Chill several hours and enjoy!

If you’re curious as to why the boiling water in #2 – it softens the cranberries a bit, and takes some bite out of the onion.  Who knew?!

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Teagie – June/July Round Up

Hello friends!  I didn’t post at the end of June, because I didn’t feel like there was a lot to say…but July’s been gangbuster!

Communication

The list of words Teagan understands is getting longer by the day.  Clap, wave, stomp, night-night, dance-dance, ear (thanks Grandma and Grandpa!), foot, splash, shake, book, ball, shoe.  I may be forgetting some – we keep a list on the fridge so I can give her teacher a report when she comes to visit.  On the downside of communication, the number of sounds T makes has gone down – she’s really resorted back to only Ds and Ns, and has picked up this LOUD scream that definitely happens most when I’m around but not looking directly at her, even if I’m holding her.  Kristin told me to keep an eye on it, but not worry too much yet, because it isn’t uncommon for kids to stop talking when they are fine-tuning their motor skills.  I’m still nervous.

But anyway – it’s awesome that she is understanding so much.  I’m going to post a video of her demonstrating her new moves (especially dance-dance – so cute) at some point, but it’s tough, because once the phone comes out, she has a one track mind.  So fun to play with mommy’s phone!

Eating

The eating…are you guys ready for this…it’s gotten better!  OH PRAISE THE LORD IT HAS GOTTEN BETTER!!  It’s so nice to drive home from work and not dread the dinner that is coming up.  She feeds herself some foods fabulously – more than just pancakes ;-).  Peanut butter and jelly or toasted turkey and cheese, oatmeal, cream of wheat, puffs, yogurt melts, scrambled eggs, hamburger, cookies.  We still have to feed her veggies – but she doesn’t spit them out, so I’ll take it.  She likes broccoli with cheese, and this mashed cauliflower recipe I found on Pinterest http://pinterest.com/pin/16255248626382085/     (which I love to – although admittedly, there is more butter and salt involved when I feed it to myself).  And she definitely has a thing for muffins – just like her mama!

Fun!

We have been doing a lot of fun things this summer, starting with swim lessons at Foss.  If we were still in the first three weeks, this would be in a section titled “Trying to Pull Mommy’s Hair Out” vs. Fun.  Teagan would scream and cling to me like a vice – luckily, the teacher is very patient and continually encouraged me not to give up and that eventually she would love it.  Teagan usually loves water, so I had a theory that it was the situation (it’s loud, it’s a weird temperature, lots of strangers around) not the water that was bugging her.  I called Julie, who is on maternity leave until her twins can drive (HA!  Julie, if you’re reading, I tease because I miss you – although we love Kristin too!  Can I have both please? ;-)) who said lots of kiddos – different needs or not – have trouble with new stimuli, and need some time to adjust to them.  Most people think “oh, she’s one, she’ll grow out of it,” which I suppose is true – but giving them some time to adjust or offering them extra security (a blanket or favorite toy, squeezing them extra tight when entering new situations) can help.  So last time, we went to swim lessons 15 minutes early, and just sat on the benches in the pool room watching the class before us.  Class was a BREEZE!  She smiled and laughed, she gave the teacher high-five, she was excited to go under water.  At the end of class, I still had all my hair and my swimsuit was where it was supposed to be.  Teacher and the patient mother who shares class with us gave Teag a round of applause.  Success.  We did our swim lesson routine with Maddy (Becky’s daughter) at Lisa, Joe, and Addie’s pool the day after that – lots of smiles and fun!

We had a visit from my very best friends who I met in college in June, Molly and Tracie – time with these girls is good for my soul.  And Teag had fun too!  We both finally got to meet Tracie’s sweet baby girl Hope.

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Teag reading books with her God-Mother

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Fun on the trampoline with Tracie and Hope

We spent the 4th of July weekend in Iowa with Joel’s parents, as well as Aunt Jaime, Uncle Jeff, and Teag’s cousins (THREE of them now).  We took Teagan to her first parade – she liked the horses and tractors, not a huge fan of sirens.  We went to Joel’s hometown reunion, which included a street dance – there are few things more fun than a small town Iowa street dance.

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Waiting for the parade!

When we’re not busy driving to Iowa (2 times in 3 weeks…and one more to go for my 15 yr reunion – ish) we are playing at the pool, boating with friends, and having general summer fun.  I hope by the end of summer, she is making lots of sounds again, and using her sippy cup.  We shall see!

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Boating with Scott and Levi

New Uses for Common Kitchen Items

I love reading posts with tips to make life easier with small, everyday changes – so I thought I’d try one of my own!!  Most of these are courtesy of my mother (especially the food ones), things I’ve known so long I don’t remember how I know them, or Real Simple magazine (which I LOVE).

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Bread – surprisingly helpful…

1. Hold a piece of bread in your mouth when you slice an onion.  Your eyes won’t sting!  (Serious!  This is not just a ploy to get you to look silly with a piece of bread hanging out of your mouth).

2. When storing cookies in a tupperware, put a piece of bread in with them – it will keep them moist (don’t you love that word?!).

3. Brown sugar hard as a rock?  Throw half a slice of bread in for 12 hours – the moisture in the bread will soften it right up!

Kitchen items and their unintended uses…

4. If you want to make cool designs with pancakes (numbers on birthdays, etc.) use a turkey baster – batter writing made easy!

5. A potato masher may be great for, well, pototoes…but it’s also super helpful when making guac!  Mash up your avocados with this tool instead of a fork.

6. When making the previously mentioned guac, if your avocados aren’t ripe enough, put them in a paper bag with a banana on a windowsill for a day or so.  If you need the guac right meow, blend them with a cup of peas.

7. I could never get the apple corer to go straight down, I always ended up with a few slices having the stem on them.  Then a women commented on a blog post with this wonderful tip – turn the apple upside-down.  This tip has changed my life.

8. Use an empty kleenex box to store bags.  It’s convenient, and looks nicer than the bag-stuffed-full-of-other-bags.  We have one on our fridge for lunches, and one in the front closet for doggie walking.

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9. If you can’t open a jar, and no one stronger than you is around, grab a piece of sandpaper to give you a better grip on the lid (hopefully the someone stronger than you and the someone who knows where the sandpaper is are not the same person.  Also I know that sandpaper is not a kitchen item.).

And when you’re cooking…

8. I’m a huge fan of using scissors for basically everything in the kitchen (used to drive my roommate CRAZY when I cut pizza with kitchen sheers).  But for reals – if you need to chop some herbs, put them in a measuring cup and cut them with scissors.  Easy, and all the bits stay in one spot!

9. If you need a tsp of an expired spice, and you don’t want to run to the store, add an extra 1/2 tsp.  It will make up for the loss of flavor, but not be overpowering.

10.  When baking bread, grease the loaf pan half way up.  This will give you a nice rounded top without a ridge around the top edge (this tip greatly impressed the judge in 4H when she tasted my banana bread oh, 20 years ago).

11.  Need cooked chicken for a recipe?  Grab a rotisserie chicken on your way home from work – delicious, and you don’t have to take the time to do it yourself.

12.  Line pans with tin foil – afterward you can throw the foil out, and the pan is still clean.

Other random goodies…

13.  My bff Molly gets the credit for this one – use painters bibs from Ikea (or wherever else you can find them) as your kiddo’s regular dinner bib.  God knows the food doesn’t stay only three inches below it’s intended destination.

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14. To make unloading the dishwasher faster, put all the same utensils in the same compartment in the silverware basket.  Then when it comes time to empty, grab one handful of spoons, one handful of forks, etc.  Just make sure they don’t all “spoon” each other, face some forward, some backward, some with the handle up, some with the handle down, etc.).

15. Use ice-cubes to water your hanging baskets.  They’ll melt slow enough that you won’t have a ton of water dripping all over your driveway.  If you have large potted plants, fill an empty wine bottle with water and stick it upsidedown in the plant –  it will seep into the soil as needed, so your plant has a steady supply of water for days!

Time for Des to Meet the Families!

WOOHOO!  It’s our favorite weeknight!  Time for the Bachelorette.  I’m getting increasingly worried Des is going to be standing alone at the end…so tempting to read the spoilers, but I know I’ll regret it if I give in!

We start out in Texas for Zak’s hometown date.  My prediction is he’ll be the one to go this week, although I myself would not make that choice (he’s so funny and cute!).  Des is remembering Zak and his shirtless first meeting and can’t believe she’s meeting his family – she is also nervous about meeting his sis (smart man – the big sisters are tough to impress).  Zak is telling Des about a dream involving a lot of precipitation…Okay I don’t even know where to take that, so lets move on.  WAIT – we can’t move on…he has a family snow cone business!  That is what he was hinting (?) at.  There are a munch of school kids asking for snow cones and Des wants to start throwing them – they aren’t chickens Des.  But speaking of birds, now Zak is in a penguin suit.  This is a weird date.

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And here we are at Zak’s parents’ house!  The sister doesn’t seem so scary, there is a lot of squealing.  Zak’s bro looks like Freddie Prinze JR (thank’s Laura ;-)).  Wow – Zak says he’s been completely naked 3 times – Mom doesn’t look surprised at all, and sis asks Des if she’s seen him completely naked.  This is some family meal!  Des and mama are one on one for a few, then Des and sis, and they all seem to be fans of each other.  Zak is talking to his mama, and he does seem pretty ga ga for Des.  You can tell by his expressive eyebrows.  Oh God…they’re all going to sing to her…awkward turtle.  Wait a minute…Zak has an ulterior motive!  He wants his family bad to be famous!

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You know when you’re in the car with someone, maybe on a road trip, and you’re singing along to the radio, but then it gets weird because they start to sing like they’re trying out for the opera?  Or maybe just American Idol?  That’s the weird vibe I’m getting from sis.  But thankfully they’re done, Zak gives her a promise ring, asks her to prom, and tells her he loves her.  Awwwww.

DREW!  I’ve missed you!  By the way – if you haven’t searched google images for photos of Drew Kenney, you should.  Goodness.  Here’s his Twitter profile pic – which might make him a little bit of a douche bag (but I still love him).

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First they’re going to see Drew’s sister, who is (his words) severely mentally handicapped, and can’t communicate.  Oh my goodness!  She (Melissa) is so excited to see them!  She is holding Drew’s hand so tight, it almost makes me want to cry.  ABC shows their relationship beautifully, well done ABC.  Now everyone is sitting outside at dinner, and Drew is reliving how uncool he played it when he got out of the limo and forgot to tell her his name.  Drew is chatting with mom and Des is hanging out with Dad.

Dad: “Do you believe in angels?”
Des: “I do.”
Dad: “Have you ever met one?”
Des: “No.”
Dad: “Yes you have.  Melissa.”

Dad talks about how Melissa has taught them so much.  They’re both getting a little bit teary.  Drew tells mom he can see himself getting down on a knee for her, and she seems really happy about it.  Dad gives Drew the go-ahead to propose as well.  Hmmm…I’m just slightly suspicious of Drew – he is a model, and he has the Jake Pavelka “I’m a super duper nice guy!” thing going.  But I still love him, and would DEF watch him as The Bachelor.  Okay he kind of word-vomited “I love you” at her.  See, now I think he’s genuine, I just can’t figure it out!  And he likes Dave Matthews (via his Twitter).

Off to Oregon for Chris’ hometown…he is wandering through the park, being sensitive and picking flowers.  First they’re going to play some baseball – ish, good thing Joel didn’t hold athletic ability as a requirement for a wife or I would still be a single lady.  They do seem liek they’re having a lot of fun together.  Oh, Des just said she is having a blast, it’s like we’re telepathic.  Chris thinks his family has quirks – he must not have heard about Zak’s family!  The father is a chiropractor and wants to give her an adjustment – it freaks Des out, but this would be a major selling point for me!  Now Dad is working on Chris, and this is happening…

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Chris and his sis are trashing the ex – well the sis is, Chris seems a little let down that no one liked her (?!).  Aw, Mom just told how Chris wanted it to be Des before he left, and how he text her from the airport when he found out it was!  Strangely timed wellness treatments aside, I have a good feeling about these two.  And Des says she doesn’t want to leave him.

Now it’s time for Brooks’ family – the previews have been making it look like he’s not as into him as he thinks he should be.  He is striding up a hill and staring longingly into the distance from a bridge – CHEESY.  Whoa – she just said to the camera “I love Brooks…” ?!  He’s having trouble because he doesn’t have time to explore his feelings – maybe he’s not a live in the moment type of person, and Des seems very much so.  Des made him a list of great moments – this seems backwards.  I guess she did make drawings for Chris.  Hey!  Brooks as they same green Old Town canoe we have!  I wonder if his has drips of paint all over b/c it was beneath the deck when someone painted it as well.

There are so many people to meet Des that they are wearing name tags!  And she gets a group hug right off the bat.

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Des talks to Mom, Brooks talks to Dad, thank goodness we’re on the last one, this is getting old!  Actually, Dad and bro are asking Brooks good questions – if Des was gone from your life, how would he feel (high gainer? if you don’t work at space, that won’t be funny).  Brooks tells us how mama’s opinion is the most important, and Mama tells Brooks that Des asked her if he was ready for marriage.  Brooks says he is pleasantly surprised about how he feels about that with Des.  Brooks is excited for the future and doesn’t want Des to leave – I think he’s the only one who hasn’t said he loves her yet.

Before the rose ceremony, Des is meeting with (gasp!) her brother Nate.  The one who was a jerk to Sean, and basically got Des booted.  He straight out says “I want to get in their heads” and Desiree isn’t going for it.  Yawn – I’m over him.  Filler.  She’s going to consider him meeting them.

OKAY GUYS, OKAY OKAY OKAY!  We’re back in LA for the rose ceremony, and Des and Chris (Harrison) are chatting.  My guess is Zak is going home.  Okay wait – I think Des just said she was hoping for a proposal with Brooks, but after Chris’ hometown was unsure.  So does that mean Zak and Drew are more or less out?  And here…we…go!!!

Rose #1 – Brooks
Rose #2 – Chris
Rose #3 –

Drew.

I knew it – but poor Zak.  Such a sweet dude.  He’s shocked, and I want to laugh at his crazy faces, but I feel to sad for him.  She is telling him how much he deserves, I’m sure that makes him feel better.  She gives the promise ring back.

ACK I couldn’t help it!

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Des is Down to Five!

YEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH IT’S BACHELORETTE TIME!  The previews are rife with strife – my gal Morgan has a theory that all the sadness is a faker – maybe they’re pretending to be in a soap opera or something.  I think she’s sups smart and maybe on to something.  OMG I really hope Michael goes home this week.

My predictions for the final three: Drew, Chris, Brooks.  I really like Zak too, but I think Des is more into the other three.  Wow, is she already down to five?  “Look at the fish?  Oh wow!” I don’t think these dudes would normally be that excited about some minnows.  OMG!  GIRLFRIENDS FROM LAST SEASON?!  Catherine, Jackie and Leslie are there – I love it!!!  Catherine and Sean are best friends – glad she updated us on that.  I don’t remember Jackie.  But she thinks Drew is a cutie, and I agree.  She has narrowed it down to a good group (minus Michael).  They’re now talking who has the best body (Des says Drew – agreed), best eyes, etc…Catherine asks about the best BEEP – aw I love me some girl time 🙂  Des’ guess is Chris.

First one on one is with Brooks – these two seem pretty nuts about each other. Chris agrees (he says he can tell they have a connection).  I do like Brooks, but I get a bit of a creeper vibe from him, I don’t know why.

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Des and Brooks are driving above the clouds, and are super excited about it.  I remember a similar experience in my life (domestic through – rocky mts) – I did not enjoy it so much, I was more worried about plummeting to my death.  There was no railing, no railing!  Anyway…

Brooks is straight up asking the tough questions – where are we between like and love – I appreciate his ballsiness (new word!).  Someone cue “On the wings of LOVE, up and above the clouds…” OOPS! That’s Jake’s season. 😉

FAIRY TALE!  DRINK!

Date card is here, and it’s Chris.  “Lets ‘sea’ if we can find love here.”  He’s pumped.  Back to Brooks and Des – where the heck is Madera anyway?  Ooh, I spelled it wrong, but it’s off of Portugal – I know because I searched, that is what you call a multiscreen experience folks.  Okay, enough of the biz talk.    I had to check facebook for a minute, and when I came back Brooks was excited that des says she was running…after rewinding twice, “running” represents how fast she is moving toward love.  But he doesn’t know if he’s ready to run until after she meets his fam.

Date day with Chris – who is head over heals.  How is a guy this good looking still this desperately single?!  As the dues wave goodbye, I am again impressed with the group she’s narrowed it down for (minus Michael).  Drew and his Ken-doll hair are disappointed that he doesn’t get the one on one.  Michael is the next one on one, which I hope is a huge flop.  Zak and Drew get the next two on one, but I guess it doesn’t mean someone is going home from it.

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OMG NOW THEY ARE writing poetry together.  Maybe these two are made for each other even more than Des and Brooks…although I have a secret theory that she is getting sick of how sappy he is.  And he’s going to drop the L word.  They’re talking about family size…blah blah blah…he’s going to do it.  I’m getting hot and nervous OH WAIT, another poem.

“Expressed in writing and felt through touch,

enjoy this moment and embrace this rush.

The strongest word with so much meaning

not too hard to believe it’s true.

Our hearts are open and in every kiss,

I truly mean that I love you.”

And she LOVES it!  She says she’s falling for him and that she could see life with him – but unfortunately, I think she’s trying to convince herself.  A date with Michael is next – barf.  I’m not sure how I’ll be able to stand this date – after hearing her talk with the girls, we know she’s impressed with his career (lawyer).  There must have been so much edited out of her date with Ben, because if it had been only what we saw, he would be gone.  WHOA…WAIT…she just said Michael was the sweetest person she’d ever met – she said that about Drew 39 minutes ago!  WHAT?!  C’MON DES, get your men straight!  Now we’re on a Wendy’s commercial (btw, I hear the frosty in a waffle cone is delish) and I realize I haven’t been paying attention – back to it.  Michael was raised but a single mama, and doesn’t talk to his biological pops – he wouldn’t pay for the diabetes bills.  The truth about Michael’s past comes out – his gf cheated on him – even though I don’t like him, I feel bad, no one deserves that.  He found out through a facebook photo, they weren’t even being careful if that happened.  And how can you not fall in love when this gal is serenading you?

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TWO ON ONE!  DREW AND ZAK!  These two are my faves – and there is a rose on the date, but it doesn’t mean one goes home, so that’s cool.  Ugh, looks like they’re at a go kart track, man I would suck at this show.  Des wants Drew to let lose, and Zak to be himself in a group setting.  Drew and Zak are racing…it’s Zak in the lead…oh man he is leaving Drew in the dust.  I love how nice these dudes are being to each other.  Wait – Drew is going to drop the L bomb?!  Man, I didn’t realize we were here already!  I guess so with five, usually I feel like we’re down to three before they start flying.  Although Brandon introduced it way early in the game.  Ha ha ha ha ha – Des just said “Zak, since you won, would you like to go first?” That’s funny – obviously they’ll both get some one on one time. Zak drew pictures to represent their path so far (oh I guess they’re paintings).  He is ga ga, but doesn’t want the words “I love you” to come out today, because he respects her and Drew and that they’ll have to hang out together the rest of the day – what an awesome dude!

I wonder if anyone else finds it odd how many random pillows are placed around this country.

Drew is talking about his handicapped sister who can’t express herself – kinda close to my heart :-).  Des just nuzzled in OH HE SAID HE’S FALLEN IN LOVE!!  And she is happy.  They walk back to the blanken with Zak, and I love the respect these two dudes show each other.  Class acts all the way.  Drew gest the rose – poor Zak.  I bet he still gets one at the ceremony.

Chris Harrison is chatting with Des pre-rose ceremony, man oh man I hope it’s Michael.  If it isn’t, I bet it’s Zak, which will make me sups sad.  She said Drew is the best looking guy she’s ever met, and husband material.  And she likes all kindsa stuff about Brooks, she’s at the finish line. (?)  I think she might be drunk.  She isn’t afraid to be hurt, good for you Des!  You can’t go through life protecting yourself…well you can, but feeling, good or bad, is what makes it beautiful.  Okay, lets get out of that rabbit hole…

Bye bye MIchael, PLEASE bye bye Michael…

And we’re at the rose ceremony, Drew is the only one who has one so far.  Brooks has a rose…(I’m so nervous)…Chris has a rose…(come on, come on, say Zak)…ZAK!!!  YAY ZAK!!! ZAK HAS A ROSE!

WHEW.  Des (in her VERY sexy-backed blue dress) is walking him out.

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Michael’s sob story – he was ready to commit to her for life (weird) and make her happy for evs and evs.  Pretty amicable break-up, except that he really wanted her to kick it with his fam.  He says no girl will be able to match up to her, and she just wants him to leave (my insight, nothing she said).  Effing wah Michael, I don’t want to hear it.

I LOVE ALL FOUR OF THE DUDES SHE HAS LEFT!  NICE WORK DES!

(I’m so confused though – where is all the drama they mentioned last week?!)

Summer Fun Bike Wash

My brother-in-law made this car wash for his kids and their neighborhood friends – such a great idea!

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PVC pipes, sponges, swimming noodles, and a hose (okay, and a few other things – you can get instructions here http://www.lowes.com/creative-ideas/kids-and-baby/kids-car-wash-sprinkler/project#noop).

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So much fun on a hot day!  Can’t wait to try it 🙂

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Des’ Dudes get Interesting

Here I ago again – lets hope Desiree’s and the boys have stepped it up a bit in my one week hiatus (although I could have gone on and one about what a jerk Michael was during last week’s two on one – she should have booted him and Ben both – but I don’t like to reward bad behavior).  Supposedly James’ true colors show this week – I’m not surprised.  Although I guess I shouldn’t judge a book by it’s cover, learned that lesson from The Sheltering Sky (have you read? ICK).

 
The crew is in Barcelona, a city which is “incredibly romantic” (aren’t they all).  OMG Michael is talking again…bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch.  Man, I love Drew, but why does he have to Ken Doll his hair?  
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Oh, he gets the first date!!  I wonder if he has to leave the rest of the dudes drinking beers outside to get ready?  Now he and Des are kissing, which she likes – she kisses a lot.  Drew gets a bit teary talking about his alcoholic father – maybe she should kiss him again.  Pretty awesome that his recovered alcoholic pops is helping other people with the same problem now.  Drew says not many people know his farther has cancer…oops, not anymore.  I’m glad these two are showing some chemistry, I like him and haven’t seen much of them yet.  Unbelievable (DRINK)…thanks for opening up (DRINK)…whoa, he just drung her into an alley and pushed her up against a wall – he’s pulling out the big guns!
 
Group date card!  Brooks, Chris, Kasey, Michael, James and Juan Pablo – that means Zak gets the one on one.  Poor Juan Pablo is sad, he hasn’t had a 1 on 1.  Drew is going to tell Des about James wanting to be the next bachelor – but he waits till AFTER he gets the rose, smart man!  They’re blurring out all Des’ good swearing – my guess is she just said “f*#$ing d@!khead.”
 
They’re playing soccer for the group date – no wonder Juan is on this one – he’s played professionally.  I think Chris and Zak were pro baseball players, lots of athletes on this one.  HA HA HA!!  Brooks (who I think Des likes a LOT) just said Juan Pablo’s name directly translates to “I’m going after Desiree and you have no chance.”  Even better – he did it in a bad Latin accent.  Awesome.  Damn he’s hot (JP).  Everyone is belittling the girls team they’re playing against…I have a feeling they might be sandbagging…yep, yep, now it’s 5-2, chicks in the lead.  The smack-talk turns to James, who is playing a half-assed goalie.  You know, if anyone is there trying to be the next bachelor, it’s probably JP – maybe he’s smart enough to keep his mouth shut about it.
 
Chris and Des are once again exchanging poetry, do people really do this after high-school   Anyone?  A dude wrote me a poem in college once, I ran the other way.  Kasey is going to confront James – kudos to him for putting it out there.  Brooks is “lost in a moment with Desiree” (maybe he should be the writer) and the rest of the dudes are fighting.  I’m sure glad Kasey has stopped using hashtags all the time.  Michael just said he hasn’t been confrontational before now, where has he been…I cannot stand him.  James is yelling and dropping f-bombs – not making yourself look good, James.  Now Kasey “has to tell Des” – I wonder if the bachelorettes/bachelors ever feel like counselors.
 
Des sends the dudes (except James) home, no rose.  She tells James she believes everything the dudes have told her he’s said.  He’s totally throwing Mikey under the bus – this will be fun to see on the ATFR episode!!  I can’t tell if James is really crying, he’s trying though.  She decides she needs to sleep on it.  Don’t fall for it Des, as a very wise (?) woman once said, players only love you when they’re playin’.  James is back and says “Gentlemen…good night.”  Dun dun dunnnnnnnn…
 
I heart Zak – I can’t believe he was the topless guy in the first episode.  He’s so not macho now, but I dig his show.  They’re drawing, badly, but they’re having a good time.  Enter male model in robe and…it’s OFF!  Nakedness on the bachelorette, not in the usual way.  He’s taking multiple poses, this is kind of hilarious.  Zak just left the room giggling, I KNEW it he’s back in the robe…and…well at least he’s wearing underwear.  Now they are at the run of the mill pillow-and-candle adorned dinner spot.  Man I wish Joel would come in from the garage, so comfy and I need a glass of wine.  Anyway – Zak’s mom is a bundle of joy, and his pops is responsible adn loving.  They both (say they) have an adventurous spirit.  “It feels so good to be in a cave with you” – now that’s love!  Seriously, the sparks are flying.  And Zak makes lots of wide-eyed faces.
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OMG MAN…JAMES IS TALKING TO DREW…Drew is defending his lady’s honor.  Argue argue argue, blah blah blah.  Super awkward the next day, and Zak starts talking about how happy he is – I love him.  Des grabs James, and the voiceover tells us she’s giving him the boot.  Ooh, kind of awkward that he’s going on about how great she is.  He means what he says, BS, Des, did you learn nothing from Stevie Nicks?!  “James can sell ice to an eskimo” – Kasey is #ontohim.  Oh man, he’s got underboob sweat, Des, never fall for a player with underboob sweat. Chris just asked “what did you guys talk about?” are ya serious?  Come on Zak, be funny!  Now he’s telling the guys what he said, but it isn’t what he said (even Joel noticed).  James just said “it’s reality” — sorry buddy, nothing about this whole business is reality.  You can tell these dudes have nothing else to do for six weeks, this is the dumbest argument ever.  MICHAEL STOP TALKING.    
 
If Des knows what is good for her, she will send James home – I think she’s stronger when he’s not talking to her one on one.  I have faith in her.  All these ad people on the show – I hope one day one of them calls on us (that really did happen once – Susan from Travis’ season met with me when she was repping a travel site.  It was awesome!  http://tinyurl.com/m9hqw6x picture does not do her justice).
 
And the roses go to Chris (no surprise), Brooks (no surprise), Drew’s got one…Michael, ugh, oh gross, seriously over Juan Pablo?!  JP?!  Des Des Des…well, at least James is going.  Juan Pablo for next bachelor!!  He’s even teary.  UGH I cannot stand Michael…”he was found guilty, case dismissed.”  Shut it.  Zak just made another killer face when Des announced they were going to an island, but I’m too pooped to get a picture.  Ooh!  She dropped “fairy tale” in the scenes from next week, haven’t heard that from her for a while!  WOW, looks like some MAJOR drama is coming, concerning Drew…am I falling victim to the editors at ABC?  We shall see!